Ribald

Note: I accidentally discovered the meaning of the title, hence the short tale below. 😀

Swearing!

Some claimed that the next words she first learned to utter after Mama and Papa were the local colorful phrases in the neighborhood. For a three-year old, uttering those vulgarity sounded cute, eliciting laughter from the adults around. As the center of attraction, gifted with candies and biscuits after every hilarious performance, her show was always a hit.

It was not funny, of course, especially to grandparents who shunned the practice. To them, it was a degradation to one’s character, demeaning and totally unnecessary in daily conversation.

Jackie, at 18 was a legend. She could be recognized wherever she went around the village. Her former status as entertainer did not diminish its luster. She took advantage of her popularity.

She was elected as barangay councilor, the equivalent of an elder in Western countries’ local set-up. In spite of her young age, she was considered ably qualified for the post, having graduated from a two-year vocational course.

However, she possessed one starkly clear liability: she swear with regularity.

That disadvantage would had been too obvious when a dignitary from the national government came to the village as a guest of honor, a speaker in a short ceremony in the opening of livelihood center for women.

The barangay captain, Jackie’s relative, planned an elaborate scheme to make her disappear for that particular day, sending her on an errand to the provincial capitol, keeping her busy without her knowing of the event to take place while she was away.

As the head of the committee for women affairs, it was her job to welcome the guest. Everyone in the council knew that that would be a monumental blunder if they allowed it. So, the secrecy and the ruse were essential for the success of the visit.

Unfortunately, Jackie would not be deprived of her place in the event.

In one of those uncanny twist of fate, she met the dignitary at the capitol, grateful to have her accompany him to the event. Theirs was a one way conversation during the trip since Jackie intelligently shut her mouth, simply nodded to agree and shook her head accordingly.

Overall, the event was a success. Everyone was overjoyed that nothing they feared materialized. Jackie was a portrait of a respectable local functionary.

They did not learn their lesson it seemed.

The next day, Jackie lorded it over the council meeting, invective galore, letting off steam for the conspiracy against her. No one wished to cross her: she was a woman scorned.

However, life was always mysterious. As they say, for every problem there’s a solution.

Jackie fell in love with John, a man whose only obsession was to kiss women. So, whenever she uttered those colorful words, he would immediately kiss her. It was okay if they were alone. In public, that would be a bit embarrassing.

Swear. Kiss. Swear. Kiss.

In time, Jackie lost her verbal habit because John still kissed her even if she did not swear. In essence, love cured her permanently.

BLOGGING   LIFE/STYLES   MY STORIES   WHISPER   ZONE

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